You’re an ultra-runner when….

I’m an ultra-runner! We come in all shapes, sizes and ages. We’re not all sporting single-figure body fat percentage and calves like diamonds, well, I’m not and I promise you more don’t than do; but there are some commonalities across the diverse mix of us. How many of these do you recognise in yourself, and those around you?

1.Race entry is based on two of these factors; good medal, great cake or free beer!
2.Ten toes, does not necessarily mean ten toe nails – equally a shade of purple or black is totally acceptable for the nails that are left!
3.You have one pair of “work” shoes, but running shoes for every terrain type, cushioning requirement and day of the month.
4.N+1 is not an equation to do with bikes, its clearly meant for running shoes!
5.The most important items in your wash bag are Vaseline, Body Glide and Preparation H.
6.When planning a family trip away, the first thing you do is ask Siri about local trail races, the second is search Strava to local run routes.
7.It’s not just bears that sh~t in the woods, but you need to remind yourself it’s polite to wait in the bathroom queue when in a restaurant with friends.
8.Your friend has been training for six months for the local road marathon, you decide the night before to enter on the day as the route looks like a good training run.
9.The pinnacle of sports nutrition is cold pizza, Scotch egg and a Greggs pasty!
10.Your TV is never on but you spend hours watching ultra documentaries and kit reviews on Youtube.
11.When you get back from a training run and your mum / partner / friend asks “how far did you go” and you answer in days not distance!
12.Your go-to going out shoes are flip flops, no matter the weather or dress code (who mentioned Crocs?!)!
I may or may not recognise or agree with all of these (of course I do); I’d love to hear of any other distinguishing commonalities that you can think of!

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